Thursday, April 24, 2008

Vice Versa

He carried her on his back and walked around the park
She chuckled and laughed her heart out every time he gently hopped.
Pointing at the flock of chirping birds and the scurrying squirrels
She told ‘happily ever after’ stories, which he patiently heard.

Leaning on the picket fence,
They sat, together on the fresh green lawn.
Hand in hand, laughing out loud,
Talking just about everything under the blonde sun;

She whispered into his ears a long list of wishes,
Some were small and some larger than life.
He nodded for everything and giggled on some,
While some put him in deep thought and made him look grim.

She asked for a bottle full of sunshine,
With its lid closed real tight.
Three scoops of the vanilla moon on her plate,
As starter, main course and dessert for dinner that night.

She wanted him to take her around the world
Carrying her on his back.
Read her a story every night,
And sing a lullaby every time he put her to bed.

Build her a castle made of candy sticks and dark chocolate,
Doors made of wafers coated with strawberry cream.
Jelly bean door knobs and caramel flavoured window panes.
And to top it all a roof made from milky white chocolate tiles.

Finally, after a zillion requests she stopped, heaved a sigh of relief.
Leaned her head on his shoulder and fell into a deep sleep.
He got up and carried his mother back to ward # 106,
Where she was kept under observation for her Alzheimer’s disease;


Ivory Maiden said...

Really Touching...
You're a greater boon when you write such beautiful insights to lesser known and cared for subjects by the masses..
Hats Off.
Keep It Rolling Scribbler!

The Muse said...

Oh my!
I am speechless!
Reminds me of what I wrote on Alzheimer's sometime back...

Simply beautiful,Impeccable:)

Pri said...

nice one!
initial part got me feeling hungry :p

very touching end :)
keep scribbling!!

Shal said...

hmm very touchin

shringi said...

i was reading about this disease in some old RD edition yesterday...amusing, strange, painful, foolish it is...... nicely put down
had to b ritten
and the man chosen is you

i like it!!

Dipa Uchil said...

ohh charlie..this is awsm..really really awsm...though first I thought they r lovers..then the few lines in the middle made me blieve that they are father n daughter...but alas...the twist in the tale...very touchin n a heartbreaking climax ther...Way to go buddy...I jst love the way u weave the words...they r so beautiful...cheers to u [:)]

shringi said...

great read there
a topic worth discussion n spread
well done!!

Anonymous said...

It was painful


smriti said...

wow!!!! sooo touchin...loved it 2 d core...truly a vice versa...amazin caption of my favorites frm u :)

Indrajit said...

tht was again a good omne wth a twist so very typical of u ... awsome

Aruna said...

Till I reached the last stanza I thought that the poem was about father and daughter. Beautifully written. Very touching.

vandana said...

:) nice :)

loved the flow n the treatment of such a sensitive issue :) the imagery is as always captivating.

on a larger perspective this write gives everyone who reads it a chance to spare a moment, think n pray of all those suffering. god bless them n relieve them from the plight.

Matangi Mawley said...

smethin heavy-
jst landed in me, again ..
it now, got my throat,
why does it happen everytime,
i read u'r post?



holy cow...wat 2 say..u r just 2 goood...

Amber Light said...

I loved the flow in the narrative and how it made images form in my mind as always. Yeah you had me thinking of father and daughter too. Extremely sad, yet beautifully written. Kudos

Dolly Singh said...

so very touching!
Reminds me of the movie,'U,ME AND HUM'
Dealing with the patients of Alzheimer's disease requires a lot of patience n sensitivity,which reflects so well in ur write..
Kudos! I loved this one a lil more than ur other writes

Sashu... said...


the kid-like innocence sparkles...

Alzheimer's, a grave traumatic experience for the family of the affected! a disease that wipes off one's character :)

you hv done more than justice to the theme..a brilliant one!

as alwz sparklin poetry!!!!

Anonymous said...


Amazing... Brilliant... Fabulous!

I simply feel short of words to describe this masterpiece.

Keep Scribbling!


P.S: Amit i have missed on so much. Anyway, now that am done with my exams... this blog is under my scrutiny again ;)

Anonymous said...

Hi Scribbler,

Thanks first of all, for visiting my blog. Even though I had read some of your previous haikus, I had not commented on any.

This post is really beautiful! It was a joy reading it.

I loved the tone of the 'child' in the mother, which is not missed from your attention - as I see you have given this a 'vice versa' title. Expressions like the moon for food and bottle full of sunshine are ingenious. The candy girl to the mother was a quick and stumbling transition. I think this is a very well-scribbled post.

I especially loved the candy house imagery and the 'blonde' sun expression. Sincerely carved verse. Keep scribbling.

Will visit you more often.

Manisha said...

everytime i read ur post it touches me a lot .... u really write well and you give due justice to the subject ......
in btw i got lot in all the fantasy of all the goodies but came down to abruptly

kamna said...

amazing..such a nice tackling of a vry pious n complicated theme..
amazing... did it UR standrd wise al ovr agn..
Hats off..
neessary to be touchd a subjct as dis by a intellectual talent as u.
m simply awe-struck!

Winnie the poohi said...

This is like a sparkling gem... more like tears of pearl.. such simplicity.. such suspense.. and ocean of pain..

Loved it to the core.. one of the poem that i will read many times yet again and still wud love it ever so more!!!

You have soo much sensitivity... it shows in this poem!! keep scribbling and thnx for sharing!!!

rukhiya said...

First,Iam new to your blog-Loved the slideshow up here!!! on the right that is :)
Second-This poem is so picturesque,the dreamy touch,the grim reality..
though i initially thot it was between a pair of people in love,the end told me all love can be! Beautiful,This mother-offspring relation! Kudos! :)

Tammy said...

This was a fantastic piece of prose. The ending jerked my mind back to reality in a bittersweet yet beautiful way. Bravo!

nemesis said...

only a sensitive soul could have captured such emotions...great job!!

rebecca said...

oh, this was beautiful. initially, i thought it was of a father/daughter relationship... until the end! how very, very tender. it is just simply beautiful. you captured that certain innocence that comes with we begin, so we end.

nickdigital said...

I felt like its inspired from the movieve the Notebook... amazing read btw ... keep writing Amit !! have blogrolled you .. will come back for more ..

Nandhini Reddy said...


A master piece yet again
Kudos ;)

Nemo said...

You always defy the very next syllable that I'd expect to hear from you. That makes reading it a very pleasant surprise! :)


shruthi said...

'leave your comment'- I stared at this for a long time before I could actually type how I felt...

Every line u write provokes thought..and.. fills u with emotions u can never speak of...!

I'm falling short of words to tell how good I felt after reading such a wonderful poem!

God Bless!! :) Keep writing!!

blogged in! said...

Very unexpected and endearing! I loved the way you have explained their dreams..

hats off!

Anonymous said...

I have read this several times now. It is a heart wrenching write. Having seen patients with dementia and the plight of thier loved ones, it left me a bit overwhelmed.

It leaves the reader stunned. It is a very well written piece.

But my failure to leave a comment can only be interpreted as a compliment to the brilliance of your work!

lavanya snigdha said...

i loved the way u started off... and even the way u kept the flow...
but then to be frank the ending was a bit too novice like... u could have done better...

nincompoop-aka-charu said...

this ws one o d most touchin poems i ve come across... brilliant s d word!! not sayin ne more cos i dunno watto... m shorta words man... way 2 go.....

Curiosity crower said...

Honestly while reading this poem I thought this would be about a Father and his sweet little girl.. but when I reached the last line, I realized this is a story about a young girl and her Son ...Very touching, very poignant and I love your style of expressing the most intricate emotion so beautifully in such simple words.. I have so much to learn from you Amit.. Bravo :) thanks for sharing :)